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Writer's pictureTerra Thomas, MS, NBH-HWC, CHPC

Space & Time


Written April 28, 2021


Space & Time


When my son was 2, I’d take him to the beach and just let him run, play, throw, dig, sit, scream, giggle, tantrum...whatever his adorable little soul felt it needed.


Observing his humanness was such a gift. Even to sit here in 2021 and reflect back to 2006, it fills my heart to remember those many moments.


Reflecting back on the routines he and I established from birth - allowing space and taking time in nature to be us (individuals and together), it is a value I emulate from my core.


I’ve danced with life over the years, as we learn, both of us stepping on each other’s toes. At times our collision was inconvenient and at times down right painful, me and life that is.


Tossed in there as well are the moments it all flows, in sync, a rhythm realized only after it’s been felt a few times. It’s never forced and it’s never found when sought, it just happens.


I think of those little ones, all of them, the clarity they hold in their desires, it’s simple. Until they are able to feed themselves, they without guilt receive what we offer. There is no deserving or expected, it is a relationship of nurturing and support. They let you know in the moment when it doesn’t work for them. As adults we don’t take it personally, we know it’s them figuring it all out. We offer compassion for their process instinctively, that’s love. There is no disassociation, aggression or avoidance - until learned anyway. It’s pure beauty to watch and observe the simplicity of a little one.


At two, when his wiggles needed a giggle, we packed up to find some space at the beach. I encourage both the giggle and the wiggle, my Littles know this well.


Yesterday, my 13 year old daughter and I spent several hours running, hiking and chatting on the front country trails of Santa Barbara. Any mother of a teen knows how precious time like this is with our daughters. Pure gold really. Taking time yesterday and allowing space while in nature wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns. Teen ‘tude made appearances and Mom’s insights weren’t well timed.

Yet post-sweat sesh, getting in the car, grabbing cold water, pulling back the sunroof, and blasting teen-selected tunes felt insanely amazing, especially as we both belted the words out as loud as possible. Most days music and Mom is as embarrassing as a pimple on the end of a nose, the pause button is pushed long before any possibility of someone hearing us... but not yesterday.


These weren’t the only gifts yesterday, there were many... I received three important calls with decisions, all confirmation I have a life of abundance. At Taco Tuesday dinner two desserts were delivered to the kids and I from a nearby table. Old friends we hadn’t seen in a few years saying, “Lovely to see you again, it has been too long, we care.” My kids looked at me as though the world had stopped, “this happens?” We laughed and showed immense appreciation, those desserts meant so much more than the tantalizing presentation and sweetness they served.


Today I invite you to hold yourself gently, allow enough space and take the time to be you where you are in the moment. Whether you feel a giggle or a cry, a sit or a sprint, what space do you desire to be you? It is so easy for life to weigh us down, the cork of our core gets pushed under the water, leaping up to breathe when we have exhausted our supplies of oxygen. Many of us then engage again, over and over, with the same routine of depletion pushing us down.


Get curious, what can you shift to replenish? You know the answer to that question better than anyone. If it’s not obvious, perhaps your just out of practice in the asking. Sit in stillness, it’s there, the clarity.


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